Things that make me happy

This week feels like summer, and obviously my inner hibernating bear has woken up. Everything all of a sudden makes sense. I am from 'south of the equator," after all. Here are recent pictures of things that make me happy.

 Colorful paper garlands.

Blue skies and tulips by my desk.

 Wilted tulips also fascinate me.

Road trips show me a world outside my own very limited 'world.' And the views are always stunning!

 Giant thread spools of colorful thread and yarn. What a sight!

And Paris! Always Paris. Even if only for two days. Glorious baguettes, croissants, and Ispahan!!

Wishing you a warm and colorful week ahead,
Giova

I wish...

-I wish I wouldn't neglect this blog so much
-I wish I had more hands to do all that I want to do
-I wish the day had more hours so I wouldn't feel guilty when I didn't do what I was supposed to do
-I wish I didn't have to wake up... some days

-I wish tele-transportation was possible so I could see my mother and sister when I wanted
-I wish spring lasted longer than winter, and summer longer than spring
-I wish I could read one book per day
-I wish I could run a marathon (just kidding)

-I wish I could eat lots of cake without having an upset stomach later
-I wish I lived nearer a place where I could see the sunset everyday
-I wish my hair would stop falling once and for all
-And I wish I would get a grip and stop wishing for impossible things

Two more things:
1- If you are interested in participating in the world famous "Flat Swap" with a spring twist let me know?? A simple yes will do for now. I just want to know if it is worth organizing or not.

2- Have you heard of the beautiful and super amazing "Encyclopedia of Inspiration" launched by Uppercase? There is still time to pre-order with a discount.

All the best, all my love (wherever you are),
Giova

Off to the fair

"Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will you set you free."

- I don't know where I got this from

"Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it."

-Maya Angelou

Even if I grew up making little things to sell at school or in front of my mother's shop I never had a table at a fair. I had always thought about it, but I was always too scared to put myself "out there." 

At the beginning of this year I told myself I would just do it and not think too much. Just do it, the thoughts can come up later. And then the timing wasn't right (when is it ever?).  I had only 15 days to make things as I had been traveling quite a lot, and I can never really find the time or energy to make things when I'm out and about. 

Of course many thoughts came and went like; Will I sell? Will people like what I do? Would people even notice the table?

Many things happened those two days, mostly in mind. The reality is always very different from what we imagined. I did sell. The people that approached my table did like what I do. And yes some people noticed my table.

The fair was the wrong fair for me and my work, it ended up being very different from what I had perceived the year before, but that has even made me more excited to find another fair that is actually better suited for me and my work. I think the first step is always the hardest, but once you're "out there" you simply are, and there is no turning back.

I have added this embroidered tree to my Etsy shop, and will be adding a few more things this week.

If you have ever thought of having a table at a fair or market, I really can't recommend it enough. Find the strength, do what you love and show it.

Lots of love, and happy spring,

Giova

Heading out

I am leaving later today on a trip that was almost cancelled 2 times. Two very different reasons, but quite amusing in their own way. Murphy's law perhaps? This is why I am not a keen planner, never have been... refundable my @$%#!!!

 Anyway, hopefully I will land in Edinburgh and will get to meet some of my Paper Love comrades.

If you have time, please look at this - Write On - maybe it is something that interests you? And then we can do our little bit in keeping the art of letter writing alive. I know there are millions of causes, each one more important than the other one, but if snail mail makes you happy, then do take a look, I think it is worth it.

Finally... my week has been all about hearts, and this one I found at my father's place... such a tiny sacred heart. I embroidered my first anatomical heart this week, which you can see here if you want. I also sent out my Valentine's parcels and hopefully they'll arrive just in time. I will share more about them next week, I promise ;)

Wishing you a magical weekend ahead,
Giova
P.S: My tarot learning experience has been amazing so far!! I might reach my goal of being an experienced tarot reader sooner than those 10 years I was aiming at.

The art of losing

Whenever I lose something I always think of this poem;

The art of losing isn't hard to master; 

so many things seem filled with the intent

to be lost that their loss is no disaster,

Lose something every day. Accept the fluster

of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.

The art of losing isn't hard to master.

Then practice losing farther, losing faster:

places, and names, and where it was you meant

to travel. None of these will bring disaster.

I lost my mother's watch. And look! my last, or

next-to-last, of three loved houses went.

The art of losing isn't hard to master.

I lost two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster,

some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent.

I miss them, but it wasn't a disaster.

- Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture

I love) I shan't have lied. It's evident

the art of losing's not too hard to master

though it may look like (Write it!) like disaster. 

-Elizabeth Bishop

I like it for many different reasons, but mostly because it puts things in perspective, and makes me think of the things and people I have lost. I've lost cities, and apartments, a beloved grandfather and stepfather, a childhood friend, pets, and chances... I've lost my way, which I find and lose all the time, sentimental objects, and lately (a week ago), a hard drive containing all the pictures from the past year or so. Also the computer... kaput!

I refuse to be angry about this fact, it is after all my fault - I kept leaving the back up for another day, and another... too late now...

Now I have been trying to re-live our birthdays, trips, and silly little memories that make up who we are as a family. I will keep on practicing the art of losing, for it is an art that needs to be mastered. This will not be the last time I lose something, that is certain.

A few things that I've lost and miss:

- a tea cup collection
- my art portfolio
- a few friends... one in particular
- my sense of smell
- my grandfather's poetry books
- more than half of my hair
- books that never came back
- photos... lots of them, apart from the recent ones
- memories... my mind is very selective, and sometimes I don't agree with what it has kept
- a pair of boots

In truth, I don't obsess about any of the above, not anymore at least. The reality is I can't do anything about them, so every now and then, they appear in my mind or heart and then they go... again. Time is a great healer but doesn't erase, that is the only thing I know for sure.

I wish you well, and hope that whatever you've lost, you've made peace with it,
Giova

A bird Spirit and some other thoughts

First of all I would like to introduce you to my recent piece "Bird Spirit." I'm exploring with different things lately and this is one of those results. I hope I captured his essence and I hope you can see mine as well. It is about nothing and everything, solitude and what we carry around with us, the things that are not visible…

Secondly I want to write a bit more about the subject of depression, just to say some things that were left out last monday...

I haven't had depression for the past 15 or 16 years, in fact my husband doesn't know that part of me. He does know my moody self rather well though. But even if I haven't felt depression lately, I did feel it for many years. So what I meant on monday is that I felt it was creeping back at me. My last pregnancy left me with a hormonal imbalance and lately my downs have been really down - like down there on the minus 10th floor or something. It doesn't mean I am depressed, … I don't think it is something I should feel ashamed of now, but I did many years ago. It was mostly how people made me feel -on top of what I was already feeling.  Some people said to me, among many other things; that depression is a joke, that we are just unhappy and  ungrateful people, that it is all in our heads… Guess what? Yes, it is all in our heads - a chemical imbalance - that most of the times need to be treated with medicine…

Depression doesn't go away because you stop listening to sad music, or exercise daily, pray to God and every saint there is, change the way you dress, read the right books, surround yourself with flowers and nature… It doesn't work like that. Just like explaining what depression is to a person who has never felt it - you simply can't. I doesn't go away because you wish it so… and the harder you fight it, the stronger it clings on to you.

I've had feelings of sadness, melancholy, frustration, failure, abandonment, you name it, I've felt it, haven't we all? - but those feelings are not depression… I can't explain what depression is, because I only know my depression, no one else's, and we are all different.

I only hope that if you are suffering from this illness you go out there and find help in any way you can.
I suffered in silence for many years until I could no longer do it. In my experience there is light at the end of the tunnel, but it also takes a looong time to find it, and once you find it - it doesn't necessarily mean it will be a constant, and bright light all the time. Life is never the same. It is filled with many ups and downs and beautiful and ugly moments along the way.

Here are a Few Things I'm enjoying at the moment:

- the view from my desk.
- this photographer's landscapes which I find stunning.
-I relish this newsletter every week, it is a joy to receive. I can't recommend it enough.
-And this work for some reason is giving me the strength to keep going on with mine. I've always been in awe of her work, but lately even more.

I hope all is well at your end, and that you have a beautiful yellow tree to look at,
Giova